i just gotta remember days like today... the day after i work my night shifts... this too shall pass :)
anticipation to get home to my boys. a little surge of energy that
lasts about 5 minutes. talking to my mom on the drive home. seeing little b's
big smile when i get home. also seeing the relief in ray's eyes... ah, mom's
home. fighting the need to sleep and the want to hang out
with my guys. pj's. maybe an hour of sleep. ray sneaking in to lay b next
to me for his nap. hearing him coo and babble and play with his silky blanket.
then the dreaded cry that wakes us up in about an hour and half. i am
thankful for that hour and a half. feeding him his lunch. watching him play
with his toys. fuss at times. want attention. making coffee.
calling friends to come over and help me stay awake (today that sweet
friend was Amy... she even brought me tropical smoothie and played
with b for a while!). watching baby einstein about 10 times. i know i know i only
do that when i am about to fall asleep. most days he only gets to watch it once.
just counting down the hours until my dear raybo gets home. and
sometime i head to my mother in laws house for b to have some
play time with people that are actually coherent and to get
some yummy dinner. toys scattered everywhere. dishes in the
sink. pacifiers scattered all over. bedtime bath. and the the big moment that i
anticipate all day... bedtime! haha :) i seriously only feel like this on
days after i work a night shift (which is actually translated : i have been
up for over 48 hours without sleep... sweet!!) so its 7:20 and munchy is asleep.
i feed him. warm up his blanket in the dryer. cuddle him. kiss him
about a 100 times. pray for him (and usually tear up). put on his
music (the music that he has listened to since he was born). and watch
him just for a second... rubbing his eyes and rolling around and finally
giving into his tiredness. and then i get my blanket. cuddle up
on the couch. feel like i have 10 lbs on each eye. and wait for
my love to come home with dinner. whew. long hard day.
thankful for my family. thankful for my job (most of the time). thankful for bedtime. thankful for grace. strength. peace. thankful for fresh eyes for my duties as a wife, mom, and nurse. and if i'm completely honest... i'm thankful for tv, movies, friends that visit. coffee. food (like tropical smoothie). my cell phone. toys that make lots of noise to keep b's attention. american idol and other various shows where i can just turn off my mind for a bit... i know that some of these dont sound super spiritual, but hey... i'm thankful :)
well, i have made it through another "day after the night shift"... all by grace and God's strength in my weakness... now i'm off to cozy up on the couch and relax... and maybe even fall asleep at 7:30 :)
(I just want to remember what this season was like... in all its glory... :)